Spiritual comedians – Joking on radio?

I must confess afore-hand that I have not conducted any scientific study on this subject I am about to share my thoughts on. Why? Well, the reasons are obvious. First of all, I do not have a donor who doesn’t know what to do with his cash and so is wiling to fund such a useless study. Secondly, I know every single conclusion I will get from the study before I even undertake it so why bother?

Anyway, to make better sense, let me ask; what is your view of pastors, prophets and other men/women of God who usually preach on radio at night; almost always in twi: shout on top of their voices: solve all problems by selling holy oil and water and only get phone-ins with gargantuan testimonies and strange dreams. Oh!! and they never forget to give you the ‘dalections’ to their sanctuaries every five minutes too.

I know you have certainly encountered them on your radio either deliberately or mistakenly, but bottom line is you know whom I am talking about. They come with the strangest of names too, ranging from ‘Naakoa,’ ‘Mallam,’ Seer, Prophetess etc.

I bet it doesn’t take a rocket scientist or the Pope to tell that most of these self-styled pastors are charlatans. The Bible says that ‘by their deeds fruits, ye shall know them’ but for some, their names alone give them away. Why then are they allowed on our radios to relentlessly deceive people and profess spiritual solutions to all problems whether political, religious or marital?

I once heard a prophet whose specialization was giving out lotto numbers on radio. The entire session on air was dedicated to phone-ins and guess what, every single person who called had a testimony of winning astronomical amounts from lotto numbers he had earlier given them. All this pastor kept demanding from each caller was his ‘thanksgiving offering.’

Really? For someone who generates winning lotto numbers for people, ‘Why is the lotto Dr. not rich’ then? What will the ‘fianga’ thanksgiving offerings do? Hmmm, maybe ‘he’s just a good Samaritan, that’s all.’

There are several verifiable reports of some pastors who go into radio broadcasts with pre-recorded call-in sessions to be slotted and played once the phone lines are supposedly activated. A cohort of praise singers, who have the stations’ numbers already and are usually more eager than political serial callers, follows them; they call in and seek ‘akwankyer3’ for very unrealistic dark dreams or mind-boggling testimonies.

The question really then is, where has this phenomenon come from and why this notoriety and seeming public acceptance or should I call it, co-existence?

I know for long, they have been disturbing our lorry stations with their 2 by 4 speakers and lousy megaphones but for their presence on radio, I will put the blame squarely at the doorstep of Accra’s first all-Christian radio station: Channel R. Channel R came in with so much promise that before long, it was a major household name in many Christian homes in Accra. If you ever heard of ‘DJ Abio’ and his popular countdown show, it was on Channel R. Hard to believe right? I know.

So what could have gone wrong with such a fine promising station? Answer; they simply sacrificed their rich Christian content for these ‘men of God’ who in turn succeeded in driving away most of their listeners. But wait oo, before you get pejorative, can you really blame Channel R? Maybe not.

I hear the pastors really pay ooo. Yes, what they pay for an hour’s broadcast will not and cannot be paid by many corporates in Ghana for a whole day’s airtime. So if you were in their shoes, which would you opt for – fine station; nice programming and many listeners but broke; or loud pastors, few listeners, yet cash in the vault?

Cash is very important in running any set-up and it is for this reason that I had to zip my lips and emotions when some few months back, right after my three-hour action-packed hiplife show on ‘Prime fm’ here in Accra, a Pharaoh- like dressed guy entered the studio with his Bible and other accoutrement to preach. ‘This hot afternoon?” I wondered – but once I checked and realised the month had curved and I badly needed the ‘bank alert’ on my phone, I just smiled and walked off like all was fine.

I have been wondering why these people often preach at night though. My educated guess is that you are prone to fear and believe what they profess at that ungodly hour than in the hot afternoon. If so, why then has Pastor Mensah Otabil started preaching in the hot afternoons on Joy FM? Well, your guess is as good as mine. He probably means to teach and not necessarily scare the living hell out of anyone.

This country is gradually entering a dangerous religious abyss if this group of self-seeking religious persons is not checked. In my view, there should be a way of screening them and not making them add up to the many failed comic attempts at entertaining the Ghanaian public. Most of them serve a good comic value though.

As for their likes on TV, whose shenanigans are even more than their radio counterparts, I may need a valid visa to seek religious asylum before I talk about them.

Twiiter – @Pasinoman

BLOG: Pasinoman.wordpress.com

EMAIL – pasifred@gmail.com