Religion Jokes

You are Not a Monk

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a
monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and
says, "My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the

The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix
his car.

As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound.
The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but
they say, "We can't tell you. You're not a monk."

The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes
about his merry way.

Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the
same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his
car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had
heard years earlier.

The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply,
"We can't tell you. You're not a monk."

The man says, "All right, all right. I'm *dying* to know.
If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to
become a monk, how do I become a monk?"

The monks reply, "You must travel the Earth and tell us how
many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand
pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a

The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he
returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, "I
have traveled the Earth and have found what you have asked
for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and
281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the Earth."

The monks reply, "Congratulations! You are now a monk. We
shall now show you the way to the sound." The monks lead the
man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, "The sound is
right behind that door."

The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He
says, "Real funny. may I have the key?" The monks give him
the key, and he opens
the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of
stone. The man requests the key to the stone door. The
monks give him the key, and he
opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He asks for yet
another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door
is *another* door, this one made of sapphire. So it went
until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver,
topaz, amethyst . . .

Finally, the monks say, "This is the last key to the last

The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns
the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the
source of that strange sound.

But I can't tell you what it is because . . . you're not a

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