The Top 13 Signs You've Hired The Wrong Magician (Part I)
13. Saws a gummie bear in half, then puts it back together.
12. Insists that his magic won't work if he puts his clothes
11. "The Amazing Kevorkian" is scaring the Hell out of
10. Makes a bird appear for the kids by simply raising his
9. Replaces pulling a rabbit out of his hat with the
slightly racier pulling the "big snake" out of his pants.
8. She closes her eyes, then claims to be invisible.
7. His first and only trick: The Amazing Disappearing Bottle
6. During one trick, screams "Pick a freakin' card already
or I swear I'll blow the little birthday boy's head off!"
5. Begins by saying his first trick "relies on the magic of
sweet, sweet love."
4. His biggest trick? Converting a sixer of Coors into
"liquid gold" -- eventually.
3. Smoke emanating from more than just the fingertips of The
2. Before every trick, tells hostess: "For this one I'm
to need to borrow your bra."
1. Her "magic words" after sawing a volunteer in half?